23 Ways Writers Alienate Clients, Publishers, Editors, and Agents

23 Ways Writers Alienate Clients, Publishers, Editors, and Agents Being a writer isnt usually thought of as a job that annoys and alienates other people. Its not like youre a telemarketer. But its entirely possible to so annoy and anger your clients, publishers, agents, and editors to a degree that they will never want to work with you again. Obviously, this is not the way to create a productive writing career. Here are twenty-three things you dont want to do if you want to be successful and keep happy clients and associates. Dont follow directions If you are told to keep a piece to a certain word count, do it. If youre told to format a work a certain way, do it. If youre told to turn in drafts at certain points during the project, do it. Clients and editors have these rules for a reason. You are not allowed to go against them just because you feel like it, or because youre artistically inspired to do so. If you have a genuinely good reason for wanting to go against their directions, ask first. Dont just do it and assume it will be okay. It wont. Miss your deadlines Deadlines are set for a reason. The client needs the project. The magazine or book goes to the printer on a certain date. Your clients are counting on you to deliver by the deadline youve been given. Preferably earlier if you can manage it. Never miss a deadline. If something comes up that will make you miss the deadline, communicate that immediately and do all you can do to rectify the mess, but expect the client to be very unhappy. Submit error-filled or incomplete work Youre a writer. Youre the one theyre counting on to submit a clean manuscript. Errors, typos and mistakes happen, but do everything you can to make sure they dont happen to you. Recheck everything to make sure youve included everything the client asked for. If the client wanted a messy, mistake-filled project, they wouldnt have bothered hiring a professional. Be demanding Agents, editors, and their interns and assistants do not work for you. They can be your partners in getting your work published, but you do not get to give them orders or make unreasonable demands. Asking your agents intern to make ten copies of your manuscript for your family to read is just wrong. Make them yourself. Similarly, you dont walk into a meeting and demand coffee or a twenty percent increase in your fee. You can advise when asked and negotiate when appropriate, but being demanding and pushy will get the door slammed in your face. Be a diva People who throw fits when things dont go their way, who think that they are above criticism, and who insist that their work is always perfect and does not need revision are divas. No one is perfect and everyones work needs touching up. Get over it and be humble. Listen to the client and take feedback constructively. Throw your fits in private, not in the clients office. Dont communicate You dont want to communicate so much that you become annoying (see #11), but most of the time you are expected to let the client know how its going, especially if you are having any problems. Ask questions if something isnt clear and let the client know if anything might prevent you from meeting a deadline. Be impatient Clients, agents, and publishers all have a lot of work to do. Theyll get to your submission or your invoice when they have a chance. Pestering them daily will only make them mad. Exercise some patience. If a significant amount of time goes by without hearing anything or if they havent contacted you after promising to do so by a certain date, then its okay to send a quick email or make a quick call saying, I submitted Project X to you on such-and-such date and havent heard anything. I just wanted to make certain you received it or if there are any problems. Dont do the assignment If you are assigned to write an article on fly fishing, the editor does not want to receive your fabulous article on bowling instead. You write and submit what you are assigned, not what your muse directed to you write. There are plenty of excuses writers use not to write. Dont fall for them, and make sure you find the time to write. Dont seek clarification If you dont think you have a good grasp of what the client wants, you need to ask for clarification. Dont do what you think they want, make sure you know its what they want. Too often a writer produces a work that technically meets the assignment guidelines, but falls short of what the client envisioned for the product. This is sometimes a failure to communicate and since you cant read minds, you need to be sure you know what the client wants. Ask and then try to get it in writing so there are no misunderstandings later. Be financially unreasonable Fees for most projects are negotiated up front, as are the cases where the writer can increase the fee (the client asks for more revisions than negotiated, the scope or size of the project changes, etc.). Thats the time to ask for more money if you think youre worth it. Holding the project hostage at the end while you argue for more money isnt cool. If you do this, youd better have a darn good reason and be prepared to end up in court. Be needy Yes, you want to communicate with the client and you want to be sure that what youre writing is going to meet their needs. But you dont want to be the person that they just cant get rid of. Always calling and asking about tiny things, asking for feedback and critique when its not appropriate, and asking for detailed explanations of rejections just screams insecurity. Editors and publishers want confident writers, not writers that require babysitting. Be unprofessional If you have to go to a clients office or appear in a video chat, dress appropriately. Skip the shorts, sweats, and pajama bottoms. Speak clearly and make eye contact. Dont mumble or use slang and curse words. Be polite to everyone you interact with, including receptionists and interns. Act like the professional you are. Dont know your limits Yes, you want to be involved in the production of your book or magazine article, but things like cover art, marketing, legalese, placement within the magazine, and paper choices are best left to the professionals. Once youve sold your work, other professionals step in to work through their parts of the process. If you insist on butting in at every stage, youre going to wear out your welcome. Fast. If someone asks your advice, give it quickly (without expounding at length as to why youre such an expert in this area) and then shut up. Dont know your limits, Part II Dont take on work for which you are not qualified. While its fine to stretch a little bit, claiming to be an expert at something that you know nothing about is wrong and will only cause problems when you cant deliver the work as promised. Dont advertise yourself as being able to write a proposal for a multimillion dollar grant if youve never written a grant proposal in your life, for example. Build your skills through volunteer work or for lower profile clients before you put yourself up for big assignments. Resort to gimmicks to get attention Calling at odd hours, sending gifts in the mail, sending singing telegrams, writing in strange fonts or colors, or in any way trying to stand out is frowned upon. If you must respond to someones kindness, a simple thank you note will suffice. Be immature Getting rejected sucks, but acting like a baby, throwing a tantrum over the phone, sending hate mail, or posting your gripes on Facebook or your blog will ensure that the agent or editor will remember you and will never look at anything you send in ever again. Ever. Call or email when youre mad Something hasnt gone right with a project and youre pissed off. Resist the urge to pick up the phone immediately. Its in the heat of anger that things are said that cant be taken back and which arent even rational. Cool off, think the situation through, and then call or email. It may really be the clients fault, but venting your anger all over the place isnt going to help. Outsource without permission If youve taken on too much work, it can be tempting to ask a friend to help you out and write a couple of articles or chapters for you. But there are problems. First, your contract may prohibit this and there can be consequences if youre caught. Second, the other person may not do professional work and you could be stuck with the bad rap. Third, this practice gives the impression that you dont care about the client enough to pay attention to their project and that you are too disorganized to handle your workload. Plagiarize It doesnt matter how strapped for time you are, or how unreasonable the client may be. Stealing another writers work is just wrong. And on the same note, never submit the same work to two clients without permission. No editor wants to see that their article is exactly the same as the one their competitor ran three months ago. Play hard to get An agent or editor isnt going to spend days trying to track you down. Make sure that you give working and correct phone numbers and email addresses, and that information is consistent across your letterhead, website, and business cards. Disappear If at any point in the project you dont think you can continue, tell the editor. Dont just stop returning phone calls and emails, even if you think you have a good reason. Agents and editors will remember your disappearing act. Have loose lips Many clients expect confidentiality. Even those that dont specify it contractually arent going to be happy to see you talk about their work or see you make fun of them on your social networking profile. And be careful what you say in public, too, because you never know who is listening. Keep your mouth shut about your clients, your work for them, and anything that you learn about them while working on their projects. Be a drunken fool The higher your profile in the writing community, the more that drunken or foolish conduct will reflect upon you. You might be able to get away with it if youre unknown (but I still dont recommend it), but if your name is appearing regularly in magazines and books, you have to watch what you say and do in public. Just because you work behind a computer doesnt mean that you are invisible. You dont want to get out of control at parties (particularly business-related functions), post a video of your drunken striptease on Facebook, or have your sister-in-law post pictures of you kissing the waiter at your cousins wedding. Clients dont like to be associated with writers who engage in bad behavior. Publishing and the business world are much smaller than you think. It doesnt take long for word of bad behavior to spread. If you turn in shoddy work (or turn in nothing at all), act like a diva, and make unreasonable demands, you can expect to find that getting assignments will become very difficult, if not impossible. Be professional and on your best behavior at all times. Thats the way to make money as a writer. (Photo courtesy of hobvias sudoneighm)